Election 2014 Through a Kaleidoscope

Trapped inside the kaleidoscope of politics

By Jeff Rutherford

Ever notice how elections often look like you’re watching through a kaleidoscope?  Here is a little collection of examples from 2014:


1.  “I grew up castrating hogs on an Iowa farm. So when I get to Washington, I’ll know how to cut pork.   …Let’s make ‘em squeal.” – Joni Ernst, Republican Senatorial candidate from Iowa.

2.  In the embattled Colorado Senate race, “Nonpartisan groups give [Republican candidate] Cory Gardner a failing grade.” Which nonpartisan groupsPlanned Parenthood, for one.  Yeah, sure — nonpartisan.  Right.

3.  John Boehner suffers from “electile dysfunction,” which occurs when “a politician has been in D.C. too long. It goes to his head, and he just can’t seem to get the job done.” – J.D. Winteregg, primary challenger in Ohio, who lost his job at a small Christian college due to this ad, and then lost the primary.

4.  “Everything we believe in, they [Republicans] hate. They don’t disagree – they hate.  …Some of them believe that slavery isn’t over and that they won the Civil War.” – Charlie Rangel, Democrat Rep from NY Congressional District 13 in New York City.

5.  “Obama headlined a Democratic Senatorial Campaign Committee fundraiser Wednesday afternoon in Denver, with half the money raised at the event going to Sen. Mark Udall’s campaign. …While the President spoke and took questions from those attending the fundraiser at a downtown Denver hotel, Udall wasn’t  there.” – CNN Political Editor Paul Steinhauser.  Why wasn’t Udall there?  According to a Udall campaign statement:  “Due to last-minute votes and legislative activity, Mark will be unable to make the trip back to Colorado on Wednesday. The Senate has decided to vote on Wednesday to confirm the new U.S. Secretary of Housing & Urban Development.”  But the HUD Secretary confirmation had broad bipartisan support, and Udall’s vote was not critical to its passage.

6.  “Republican Cuts Kill.” Political ad by The Agenda Project claiming that cuts to the National Institutes of Health in President Obama’s budget, and forced cuts due to sequestration, are all Republicans’ fault and are responsible for the 2014 Ebola outbreak.

7.  “Guys, guys, guys, guys. If Cory Gardner gets his way, you better stock up on condoms.” NARAL Pro-Choice Colorado ad, despite the fact that Gardner advocates making birth control pills available over-the-counter without a prescription.

8.  “[Kentucky Senate challenger] Alison Lundergan Grimes has barnstormed Kentucky, talking up her support for raising the minimum wage. …So you might be surprised to find out that Grimes’ family business [“Hugh Jass Burgers”] pays some tipped employees only minimum wage [$2.13/hour].  ” – Chris Frates, CNN reporter.

9.  “A while back, Congressman Yoder made news by skinny-dipping on the job. But it’s more shameless what he’s doing to Kansas.  The nekkid truth is that Yoder voted to cut Medicare for seniors.” – Ad for Democrat candidate Kelly Kultala, challenging KS 3rd District Republican incumbent Kevin Yoder.  The reference is to his bad judgement in removing his clothes to briefly swim alone in the Sea of Galilee during a congressional fact-finding trip to Israel in 2012.

10.  “I believe in every aspect of our Constitution, which even a baby knows includes the 2nd amendment.  If you’re the sexual predator and sociopath who murdered my sister Lynnette, and you come to my front door to do harm to my girls, I’m gonna use my Glock to blow your balls off.” – Bob Quast, independent candidate for an open state Senate seat in Iowa.

San Diego kaleidoscope(photo credit)

Related:  Jon Stewart Finds The Craziest Ads Of The 2014 Senate Races


About Necessary and Proper

Jeff believes in the Individual's ability to excel when liberty and freedom of choice are protected. Also believes in the Community's ability to take care of the vast majority of its own issues and needs when the federal government leaves the Community's resources and sphere of control alone. State and local choice produce better results than centralized federal control. https://necessaryandpropergovt.wordpress.com/
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4 Responses to Election 2014 Through a Kaleidoscope

  1. Thanks for the amusing quote collection! We don’t have a Senator or Governor up for contest this year in my state (WA), so it has felt like we are watching everyone else’s election through some kind of scope.

    Fortunately the campaigns for jobs like municipal judge and county sheriff have been just as nasty and nutty as the ones you refer to.


    • Mikey, you didn’t mention Democrat Derek Kilmer’s congressional re-election race, so I guess you see that as a lock, huh? Too bad.

      Where do your sheriff candidates stand on the 2nd amendment?
      – Jeff


      • Oh yeah, Kilmer’s polling double-digits ahead of his opponent. The GOP nominated a place-holder.

        I live in Jefferson County, and our sheriff contest has been about the nastiest, smeariest one I’ve seen for ANY office! The “real” Dem, Wendy Davis (not from Texas) favors the expansion of background checks in initiative 594. She’s an ex-Marine, former Deputy Chief.

        The other guy, Dave Stanko was a lifelong Republican retired swat cop who nonetheless said he was a Dem at first. When the party endorsed Wendy he suspended his primary campaign for six weeks, but re-entered the race when the “independent” (another Republican) got into trouble for lying about his resume. He now says the office should be non-partisan. He says whatever the law is, he will uphold it.

        Neither candidate has been grilled about their stance on the 2A, nor have they offered opinions on it. It doesn’t appear to be of much interest to voters, since they are both experienced cops who hunt.

        The local papers have had a field day debunking the robocalls and anonymous mass emails that all seem to be aimed at Davis. Accusations include her troubled son killing himself with her service revolver and various other lies.

        The 2A issue in WA offer a choice of two initiatives, one (594) expanding background checks to include gun shows and person-to-person transactions, the other (591) forbidding any gun restrictions above the Federal standard.
        594 is favored by about 7 points. 591 is expected to be defeated.


  2. Some of these quotes were hilarious, Jeff! I particularly enjoyed the “castrating hogs = cutting pork” quote, and reading the one about Boehner’s “electile dysfunction” cheered me to no end. That’s about the most astute thing I’ve heard said about him.


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